All Day Birthing Class

I will go on record and say that if you have a choice, never ever take an all day birthing class.  The only reason we did was because of our different work schedules.  We knocked out 6 classes in an eight hour window on November 19th. 

Each class had a different title, but since it was all day class, I don't remember any of them.  It was like a blur, so much info, so little time to compute.  The basics were fairly simple, I had no problem putting diapers on a doll that was not struggling or fighting against me.  Learning how to properly bath a newborn was informative.  I remember and firmly believe in, if you don't know if your baby is actually sick or just not feeling well, but you're not sure, call a doctor, or mom or mother-in-law. 

I know that the wife's recovery is very important and can take some time, which is to be expected.  The instructor mentioned to the guys that we might be on the hook for cooking and cleaning for the first  six weeks, which is about par for most mom's recoveries.  I just hope Melissa doesn't get tired of hamburgers, pizza, grilled cheese and such.  I'll be off for the first two weeks so maybe I can expand my menu, or we'll end up eating a lot of pick up. 

The videos we were shown were very dated, but covered everything you need to know about what happens at birth.  And, yes, guys, they are not pretty, but you need to go through this so you know what to expect in the delivery room of your own wife, or mother of your child.
Since we took the all day class, we didn't get a chance to learn baby CPR, we might be signing up for that later.  All in all it was a great day, time spent with my wife, met some new people, learned about delivery and newborns, but still suggest the night courses!

Days 3 & 4 of Birthing Class... not a riot. -Ryan

If the cart of babies being wheeled by doesn't frighten you, she then asks you to take one. It then sits there in front of you and lays motionless for the next three hours. I knew we were to learn how to preform CPR on a newborn, and I didn't like it. Not one bit.

Last night was full of the stuff you need to know, but didn't want to, about your baby. It's a good class and I am really glad I went, you just can't help but empathize with all of those parents who actually have been put in the scenarios we were training for. God bless them. I found myself uneasy with most of the conversation and techniques, although they were hypothetical. So much in fact, I didn't write about class three for fear of the whole post being one giant buzz kill.

I had to learn this stuff so now I will share, in country guy talk. "If yer kid ain't breathin, then don't you hesitate. Ya gotta grab hold of 'em like a football, with that face of theirs down looking at yer crotch, and wack 'em with your palm 5 times right between the blades. Than again front side, this time only use two fingers in between the belly button and the nipple line. Five and five."

If you discover your child's not breathing, then you must remember the Bee Gee's hit staying alive. Even if you have poor rhythm like me, you can keep that beat. Don't waste anytime and get to work, place two fingers right in between the nipples and press 30 times. Breathe twice into the child's mouth covering the mouth and nose, repeat. I guess they used to have other the steps like listening for breathing, or checking for an obstruction before CPR, but it was too much to remember & intimidating, and so now they just want you to get right to it. Thirty and two is the important part.

Mrs. Manning referred us to this video. I was happy to know that she too is an Office fan.

Another strange phenomenon I learned about is Plagiocaphaly, otherwise known as "flat head syndrome."  According to the American Association of SIDS prevention physicians    (AASPP), They highly recommend you lay your baby on their backs while they sleep, this is supposed to be the most effective way to prevent SIDS. As mothers have been doing this, the pressure from this position over time is causing the skulls of the child's head to flatten. One half of all children will suffer from this to some extent and (in some children) can even become severe enough to cause brain damage. We were recommended to look into getting a "noggin nest," which has a hole conveniently cut out to relieve that constant pressure. Also to have "tummy time" during the day.    


Molly's due date will land somewhere in the middle of October, which means she will spend her first six months during the peak season for RSV. Respiratory Syncytial Virus is a highly contagious germ that causes lung and airway infections in infants. From what I understand, this can create a very grueling regiment for the parents- constant monitoring is in order because it can lead to much more serious problems. The number one cause of this bug is exposure to large crowds, such as Wal-mart, daycare, and other overpopulated places. The second leading cause is second hand smoke, either from breathing it in the same room, or off of clothes and hair. I always thought the parents that kept hand sanitizer in every room were way over protective, but I get it now. Don't get me wrong, I do plan on taking Molly out, and like it or not, family and friends who smoke will get to hold her. I will just be a little overly cautious for those crucial first six months when she is most susceptible. This means, very few trips to the store (completely covered when out) and smokers will have to get used to the hand sanitizer and removing smoking gear, jackets and such.

Well, that's it for this round of baby fear factor. Next week we are planning on having a 4D sonogram! If you have ever seen these things then you're going to find that post very boring. I you haven't, then prepared to be wowed!

Birthing class take 2.... ouch! -Ryan

We made it out Tuesday night to birthing class once again. As I expected they started the class out with a few videos. Mrs. Manning told us that is would not be as graphic as the videos from class one... Mrs. Manning was a liar.
Yes, the videos were computer animated and maybe I can see why that might factor into her poor judgment, but computer animated or not, watching an episiotomy is awful. Much worse then watching real people give child birth. We also watched a caesarean in a 3-d animation, not fun either, but I did have an idea on what I was about to see before that. I know that we have come so far in technology in so many areas, but I'm still really surprised to see how primal child birth is. Man has yet to figure out a smooth way to get a cantaloupe through a .... ah, I dunno, I just sat here for 5 minutes trying to think of a inanimate object to compare a woohoo to. Any how, mad respect to all the mothers out there for putting your bodies on the line to make life happen, I learned something.

After the videos we went on a tour of the Baptist hospital delivery rooms. There were only two women in labor when we got there and no one had delivered at that point, so unfortunately we didn't get to spy on any new life through the viewing window. Instead, we found out that Wednesday is the busy day in the maternity ward. "How is this possible?" I wondered. How do you know what day your going to be busy in a labor room? It turns out that many of the doctors around town have so many patients that they prefer to schedule and induce all of their expectant mothers on one day in order to stream line their productivity, the American way. I don't find anything wrong with inducing if its the mother's decision, but I have learned that when induced, your body has less time to prepare for labor, which means that you will be much more likely to take more damage during the birthing process. I refuse to force my wife into any more pain then necessary, so that my very well paid doctor can catch his Sunday morning golf game.

After our tour we went back to our class and Katherine got to practice her breathing technique. As she laid on the floor trying to relax, I knelt beside her and stroked her hair. I thought to myself how blessed I am to have a woman like this in my life, giving me meaning, and taking on challenges I am certain I couldn't face alone. This life I have been given, is a gift from God.
 

Day one of birthing class -Ryan

So last night Katherine and I got a chance to go to our first birthing class. It runs every Tuesday night from 6 - 9 pm, for a total of four classes. We tried to sneak in (running 15 minutes late) and were welcomed by a very sweet lady, Mrs. Donna Manning. Mrs. Manning greeted us very warmly, and told us she promises never to start the class on time or keep us there until 9pm. She won me over quickly.

Only two other couples were in the class when we first arrived, all were around our age. A few minutes later reality walked into the room in the form of a very pretty eighteen year old high school girl. She was unaccompanied by any family or spouse and quickly explained that she was still going to the New Hope High School.

I immediately went back in time and thought about myself at eighteen. What a sad piece of work I was. I had know idea what my future looked like or even cared for that matter- fun was it. I didn't think about consequences and was completely self absorbed. The thought of that kid trying to bring anyone into this world would have been bad (by bad I mean incredibly awful). I pray this girl has a strong support system at home. I applaud her for her courage and for facing this class alone, if she felt insecure or awkward, then she never showed it.

As class went on Mrs. Manning explained we were to watch a video of a lady giving birth. She also explained that she would be blocking the door to prevent any men from trying to escape. The video picked up with a woman and her husband just as she started into labor. She spoke with excitement and you could tell she was eager to get started. They showed several clips from through out the labor, each one you could see a more serious expectant mother as the contractions grew stronger. At one point they show her walking up and down the halls and you could tell she was exhausted, she would have to take breaks and would need support from carrying her own body weight. Since she was in the middle of the hospital and had nothing to lean on, her husband would get down on the floor and act as a "table" for her to crouch on. I could see the excitement in Katherine's eyes at the thought of me being her table.

The birth finally came and it was gross, the after birth was sicker. It looked like some one took all the hair from the vacuum of a cat lady's house, dipped it in blood, and squeezed it out, gross. I think I can handle it, but I don't believe I'll cut the umbilical cord, I see no use in that.

Next week we will be talking about the birthing process and doing a long Q&A. I'll be sure to keep you all informed.